TERRIBLE

“The quickest way for a parent to get a child's attention is to sit down and look comfortable.” - Lane Olinghouse

I’m trying to take a new approach with my two year-old daughter and her relentless quest to do as she pleases! I want to try and understand why she does the things she does; what makes that tiny new brain tick? Now I know this doesn’t sound like a very assertive brand of parenting, very passive and psycho-analytical, but we’ve reached a point where the obvious methods and techniques have to be abandoned in favor of something deeper, something that will produce answers.

If not, the asylum will soon be run by the inmates my friends. And by inmates I mean my 2 year-old daughter. I would never do anything to stifle her curiosity or imagination but at some point shouldn’t she stop stifling my authority? I want to dismiss it as her being so young. The only problem with that is that if she can understand “time to eat”, “bath time” or “let’s play with the ball”, then I’m certain she should understand “don’t touch that”, “leave that alone” or “stop kicking daddy there” and if she isn’t clear the first time, surely she should get the hint after the fourth and fifth times she hears it.

Right?

So my plan is to study her, get into her head and try to figure out why she melts my heart with hugs and kisses only to stop it from beating by jumping feet first onto my chest while I sleep on the couch. Why? What did I do to deserve that? I’m convinced that the cerebral approach is what’s needed. When your 2 year-old musters crocodile tears as not to offend your ego after you’ve “disciplined” her; it’s a sign that more research is necessary because this ain’t a normal 2 year-old, she just can’t be. I love my daughter more than life itself which is why I’m so determined to get to the bottom of this behavior so that I can keep her. 

So if there are any experts reading this, or friends of experts or someone that knows someone that saw something on Super Nanny, please contact me.

~Cp